Saturday, September 01, 2007
Happy Birthday to me (for yesterday)
Happy Birthday to me (for yesterday)
Happy Birthday dear Johnny (for yesterday)
Happy Birthday to me (for yesterday).
That's the fun bit out of the way, because my Birthday didn't quite go to plan. In fact it pretty well turned to shit from the moment I rose from my bed.
I awoke with a bit of a dicky stomach. I blamed it on the dodgy Chinese takeaway from the night before. (Yes, as suspected, Lorraine cried off from going out for a meal on Thursday evening due to some unspecified illness. Hell, I'll give her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she was feeling unwell. Sometimes it happens.) After a while on the toilet, and a good scrub in all crevices in the shower (too much information?), I decided to go and see a film ("Hallam Foe"). There would be plenty of time before Lorraine arrived home and we had to leave to see "Cats" at the Birmingham Hippodrome.
I felt unwell on the bus, but it was manageable. I bought my ticket and went to the toilet again. I was there for awhile. I went in just as the movie was starting. (Unusual for me. I like to get into the cinema, shut my eyes in the adverts and then open them to watch the trailers.) My stomach hurt and it seemed particularly distended. I had a strange feeling in my throat. I prayed for the film to end and it was not because it was a bad film. (Like all of David Mackenzie's films it was interesting). The film ended. Before the credits started to roll I ran for the toilets. I vomited and also produced a quite beautiful waterfall of a shit. Damned lucky they were not simultaneous events. (Again, if there is too much information here, I apologise.)
Somehow... I got home. I rang Lorraine.
"I might not be going to see 'Cats'. I don't feel very well."
I went to bed. This was at 2pm. Things got vague after that. I was sweating like a pig. There were toilet visits. I had sex dreams about a girl that I talk to on the bus, sometimes. Shapes on the curtains in the front bedroom were moving and I could a tableau of three astronauts praying to a Cat God. The head of one of the astronauts was surrounded by a veil of psychic power which, apparently, is what happens when a Cat God appears. A headache came and went.
Lorraine arrived home. She asked if I had taken any of the anti-diarrhoea tablets that the Doctor had prescribed for me the last time I had 'bottom' problems. I hadn't. I told her that I couldn't swallow anything as it made me sick. Lorraine was furious. I think she said that she couldn't believe she had wasted so much money on tickets for a show that I couldn't be bothered to go to. I told her to "go fuck yourself" if she thought I was putting this on and to "go on your fucking own if you want to!"
Lorraine rang around to see if anybody wanted the tickets. Nobody did. She bought me water during the evening. I ate nothing. I dozed. I woke. It got dark. I slept. I had stomach pains which stopped sometime after 3am. I finally rose from my bed at 8am. Lorraine wasn't in the house. She left a note to say that she had gone to work.
Fun day. Yes?
I have a bit of a headache, but feel fine now. The family are coming out for a meal later. I can do it. I will eat sensibly and in small portions. It is a buffet. It will not be a problem.
I have paid Lorraine back for the tickets, although she told me not to bother. She is upset that she did not get me a birthday card (not sure how she missed that) and, as she bought the tickets as a birthday gift, she has not got me a birthday present either. I told her to get me something later or to get me something extra special for Christmas.
Things have been bad all around. Today I have managed to massively upset my Mom during a phone call I received today and have been told off by both Sister's 1 and 3. I am not going to go into that now.
The way I see it, things have been bad, but today is the start of a new year for me. I will endeavour to make things better. It is all I can do. I'm such a saint, I could just shit. Ah... But I've been doing plenty of that. Ha ha ha!
Thoughts will follow in due course of the plays "The Last Confession" and "The Thirty Nine Steps" and the movies "The Wicker Man", "Seraphim Falls" and "Hallam Foe". Later, but for the moment I need to rest and do nothing.
Happy Birthday to me (for yesterday)
Happy Birthday dear Johnny (for yesterday)
Happy Birthday to me (for yesterday).
That's the fun bit out of the way, because my Birthday didn't quite go to plan. In fact it pretty well turned to shit from the moment I rose from my bed.
I awoke with a bit of a dicky stomach. I blamed it on the dodgy Chinese takeaway from the night before. (Yes, as suspected, Lorraine cried off from going out for a meal on Thursday evening due to some unspecified illness. Hell, I'll give her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she was feeling unwell. Sometimes it happens.) After a while on the toilet, and a good scrub in all crevices in the shower (too much information?), I decided to go and see a film ("Hallam Foe"). There would be plenty of time before Lorraine arrived home and we had to leave to see "Cats" at the Birmingham Hippodrome.
I felt unwell on the bus, but it was manageable. I bought my ticket and went to the toilet again. I was there for awhile. I went in just as the movie was starting. (Unusual for me. I like to get into the cinema, shut my eyes in the adverts and then open them to watch the trailers.) My stomach hurt and it seemed particularly distended. I had a strange feeling in my throat. I prayed for the film to end and it was not because it was a bad film. (Like all of David Mackenzie's films it was interesting). The film ended. Before the credits started to roll I ran for the toilets. I vomited and also produced a quite beautiful waterfall of a shit. Damned lucky they were not simultaneous events. (Again, if there is too much information here, I apologise.)
Somehow... I got home. I rang Lorraine.
"I might not be going to see 'Cats'. I don't feel very well."
I went to bed. This was at 2pm. Things got vague after that. I was sweating like a pig. There were toilet visits. I had sex dreams about a girl that I talk to on the bus, sometimes. Shapes on the curtains in the front bedroom were moving and I could a tableau of three astronauts praying to a Cat God. The head of one of the astronauts was surrounded by a veil of psychic power which, apparently, is what happens when a Cat God appears. A headache came and went.
Lorraine arrived home. She asked if I had taken any of the anti-diarrhoea tablets that the Doctor had prescribed for me the last time I had 'bottom' problems. I hadn't. I told her that I couldn't swallow anything as it made me sick. Lorraine was furious. I think she said that she couldn't believe she had wasted so much money on tickets for a show that I couldn't be bothered to go to. I told her to "go fuck yourself" if she thought I was putting this on and to "go on your fucking own if you want to!"
Lorraine rang around to see if anybody wanted the tickets. Nobody did. She bought me water during the evening. I ate nothing. I dozed. I woke. It got dark. I slept. I had stomach pains which stopped sometime after 3am. I finally rose from my bed at 8am. Lorraine wasn't in the house. She left a note to say that she had gone to work.
Fun day. Yes?
I have a bit of a headache, but feel fine now. The family are coming out for a meal later. I can do it. I will eat sensibly and in small portions. It is a buffet. It will not be a problem.
I have paid Lorraine back for the tickets, although she told me not to bother. She is upset that she did not get me a birthday card (not sure how she missed that) and, as she bought the tickets as a birthday gift, she has not got me a birthday present either. I told her to get me something later or to get me something extra special for Christmas.
Things have been bad all around. Today I have managed to massively upset my Mom during a phone call I received today and have been told off by both Sister's 1 and 3. I am not going to go into that now.
The way I see it, things have been bad, but today is the start of a new year for me. I will endeavour to make things better. It is all I can do. I'm such a saint, I could just shit. Ah... But I've been doing plenty of that. Ha ha ha!
Thoughts will follow in due course of the plays "The Last Confession" and "The Thirty Nine Steps" and the movies "The Wicker Man", "Seraphim Falls" and "Hallam Foe". Later, but for the moment I need to rest and do nothing.
# posted by Pynchon @ 4:32 pm 
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