Monday, June 11, 2007
I am in terrible pain. It hurts to stand on my right ankle. My shins ache. My thighs throb. My right wrist hurts. My fingers will not bend properly. My face is also red and the skin has started to peel off the top of my head.
The reason?
On Saturday morning I did some gardening. It was the hottest day of the year so far. I didn't wear a hat and muscles that didn't want to get used were used. Four hours of torture.
Never again. Bloody garden. When we were looking for a house, Lorraine announced that she wanted a house with a reasonably sized garden because she would, and I quote, "do things in it". All lies! Foul woman. I think Lorraine has spent maybe two hours working in the garden in the past six years, and that was back in 2003.
It's all my Brother's fault that I was in the garden on Saturday morning. I was supposed to have been going with him to choose a new laptop, but 10 minutes before I was due to leave the house he called to tell me to forget it. He wasn't bothered about getting one straight away. I think he called from his bed. Bastard.
There was a choice. Go to the cinema (tempting, but I'm always going to the cinema), clean the house (No, I did it last week) or tackle the jungle. I did what I thought was the right thing. Serves me right for being such a caring, wonderful, modest example of manhood.
Lorraine has expressed kind words.
"You should have worn a hat. You're also fat and out of condition. Going out in the garden probably did you good!"
I gave her the evil eye and made a sign at her with my finger.
Other than a trip to my Mom's to deliver Sister 2's late birthday presents ("Cool Runnings" and "Planes, Trains and Automobiles" on DVD), a trip to the cinema yesterday and a quick detour to the train station to pick up Lorraine's train tickets for Thursday, I have been safely ensconced in the house, slumped in front of the TV set.
We watched "Firewall" on cable.
Absolutely dreadful. Cliche upon cliche. Not an original idea in the whole movie. Virginia Madsen - wasted. Paul Bettany - wasted. Mary Lynn Rajskub playing Chloe, again. Annoying children and, oh fuck me, a cute dog! Terrible. Awful.
Lorraine and I really enjoyed it. No, we did. Really. "Firewall" was really funny. I'm just not sure that it was supposed to be funny...
I hate to add a note of ageism here, but Harrison Ford now seems way too old to be playing action parts. In "Firewall" he looked old, at the age of 64, in a way that neither Connery nor Eastwood looked old at the same age. Such a shame. I'm not looking forward to "Indiana Jones 4" at all.
After Lorraine had gone to bed (she refuses to watch horror) I watched the 2006 remake of "The Hills Have Eyes" on cable. I had seen the original years ago, and it made such an impression on me that I cannot remember anything about it, except for Michael Berryman's startling appearance.
I really enjoyed "The Hills Have Eyes" remake. I thought it was great. Mutants. Horror. Torture. Plenty of gore, for the gore hounds. Plenty of violence for the... Er... Violence hounds. A heroic dog! Good performances from everybody, but especially from Aaron Stanford, looking years older than his turn in the "X-Men" movies.
I find the majority of horror films not at all scary; maybe I've seen too many of them over the years, but for me "The Hills Have Eyes" has one great jaw dropping moment when (Spoiler) mutant guy with teeth breastfeeds from the nursing sister... and then her Mother arrives (End of spoiler).
It's a scene that lasts only a matter of seconds, but Yuck. I'll say it again. Yuck. Urgh and Yuck and Urgh again.
Lorraine and I watched "Doctor Who" on Saturday. Great, brilliant, scary episode. The BBC billed it as the most frightening modern episode of "Doctor Who" that they have ever done, and they were right. I was absolutely on the edge of my sofa. Lorraine had a cushion ready to cover her eyes in case the horror tried to drive her mad.
Lorraine and I watched the "Any Dream Will Do" finale. I had a cushion ready to cover my eyes in case the horror tried to drive me mad. Curly haired Lee triumphed over goofy teethed Keith and Max Headroom haired Lewis. He was the right choice.
I need to go to bed to rest my limbs. I was serious about the pain. I will add links tomorrow.
The reason?
On Saturday morning I did some gardening. It was the hottest day of the year so far. I didn't wear a hat and muscles that didn't want to get used were used. Four hours of torture.
Never again. Bloody garden. When we were looking for a house, Lorraine announced that she wanted a house with a reasonably sized garden because she would, and I quote, "do things in it". All lies! Foul woman. I think Lorraine has spent maybe two hours working in the garden in the past six years, and that was back in 2003.
It's all my Brother's fault that I was in the garden on Saturday morning. I was supposed to have been going with him to choose a new laptop, but 10 minutes before I was due to leave the house he called to tell me to forget it. He wasn't bothered about getting one straight away. I think he called from his bed. Bastard.
There was a choice. Go to the cinema (tempting, but I'm always going to the cinema), clean the house (No, I did it last week) or tackle the jungle. I did what I thought was the right thing. Serves me right for being such a caring, wonderful, modest example of manhood.
Lorraine has expressed kind words.
"You should have worn a hat. You're also fat and out of condition. Going out in the garden probably did you good!"
I gave her the evil eye and made a sign at her with my finger.
Other than a trip to my Mom's to deliver Sister 2's late birthday presents ("Cool Runnings" and "Planes, Trains and Automobiles" on DVD), a trip to the cinema yesterday and a quick detour to the train station to pick up Lorraine's train tickets for Thursday, I have been safely ensconced in the house, slumped in front of the TV set.
We watched "Firewall" on cable.
Absolutely dreadful. Cliche upon cliche. Not an original idea in the whole movie. Virginia Madsen - wasted. Paul Bettany - wasted. Mary Lynn Rajskub playing Chloe, again. Annoying children and, oh fuck me, a cute dog! Terrible. Awful.
Lorraine and I really enjoyed it. No, we did. Really. "Firewall" was really funny. I'm just not sure that it was supposed to be funny...
I hate to add a note of ageism here, but Harrison Ford now seems way too old to be playing action parts. In "Firewall" he looked old, at the age of 64, in a way that neither Connery nor Eastwood looked old at the same age. Such a shame. I'm not looking forward to "Indiana Jones 4" at all.
After Lorraine had gone to bed (she refuses to watch horror) I watched the 2006 remake of "The Hills Have Eyes" on cable. I had seen the original years ago, and it made such an impression on me that I cannot remember anything about it, except for Michael Berryman's startling appearance.
I really enjoyed "The Hills Have Eyes" remake. I thought it was great. Mutants. Horror. Torture. Plenty of gore, for the gore hounds. Plenty of violence for the... Er... Violence hounds. A heroic dog! Good performances from everybody, but especially from Aaron Stanford, looking years older than his turn in the "X-Men" movies.
I find the majority of horror films not at all scary; maybe I've seen too many of them over the years, but for me "The Hills Have Eyes" has one great jaw dropping moment when (Spoiler) mutant guy with teeth breastfeeds from the nursing sister... and then her Mother arrives (End of spoiler).
It's a scene that lasts only a matter of seconds, but Yuck. I'll say it again. Yuck. Urgh and Yuck and Urgh again.
Lorraine and I watched "Doctor Who" on Saturday. Great, brilliant, scary episode. The BBC billed it as the most frightening modern episode of "Doctor Who" that they have ever done, and they were right. I was absolutely on the edge of my sofa. Lorraine had a cushion ready to cover her eyes in case the horror tried to drive her mad.
Lorraine and I watched the "Any Dream Will Do" finale. I had a cushion ready to cover my eyes in case the horror tried to drive me mad. Curly haired Lee triumphed over goofy teethed Keith and Max Headroom haired Lewis. He was the right choice.
I need to go to bed to rest my limbs. I was serious about the pain. I will add links tomorrow.
Labels: Illness, Lorraine, Movies, Television
# posted by Pynchon @ 10:02 pm 
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We didn't get to see much of Max Headroom here in SA, but I loved Merry Christmas Santa Claus and his collaboration with Art of Noise on Paranoimia. Ah, good memories!
Hope you recover soon from your 'extreme gardening' session.
Hope you recover soon from your 'extreme gardening' session.
Gardening is rough — every time I rake the yard, which is very often given the number of pine needles that fall in the autumn, I'm in pain. Even if you exercise regularly, gardening uses different muscles. Feel better soon!
Ooh... that really was a totally brilliant episode of Doctor Who, wasn't it? One of the best ever, I think. I love all that mindboggling time travel stuff. They don't do nearly enough of it.
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