Pynchon

Hi Gang! I bring words of wisdom!

"Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak."

"He who laughs last, thinks slowest."

"Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine."

"Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't."

"Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool."

"The 50-50-90 rule: Any time you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong."

"If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog."

"If the shoe fits, get another one just like it."

"The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first."

"Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries."

"The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room."

"A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well."

"When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty."

I have left some things incomplete and that is a situation that I cannot allow to stand.

I never did finish writing about "The Prestige".



"The Prestige" is based on the 1995 novel by the British writer Christopher Priest.

On 26th February 1983 I met Christopher Priest when he was doing a signing session at the legendary (in Birmingham, at least) science-fiction and fantasy bookshop Andromeda. I was 19 years old. At that time I was criminally shy, quiet and withdrawn. I looked a state. I was not cool (unlike now, NOT!) I didn't have enough money to buy whatever tome he was flogging at the time, so I hung around outside for a couple of hours trying to raise the courage to go into the shop to buy something he had written that was out in paperback, and to try to get him to sign it. I did get my act together, went into the shop, picked up a copy of his fine novel "A Dream Of Wessex" and approached the counter with trepidation. I think that I was the last customer in the shop queued to see him.

Of course there was nothing to worry about. Christopher Priest was, and I suppose still is, a lovely man. At that point he would have been about 40. Long hair. Very untidy. Freakishly tall and he was wearing cords. (Hippie!) He had something of the air of a distracted maths teacher about him.

I mumbled something about liking "Fugue For A Darkening Island" very much. He was surprised by that, but also glad. He told me that the critics thought that it was a "load of crap". We talked for a little bit. I didn't feel patronised. It was two guys having a chat about books.

Pre the time that the Internet, movies and television starting taking up all of my time, I was an avid reader. I devoured books. I still devour magazines, but not books. It is one of the biggest regrets of my life that I have managed to get out of the book reading habit. A cursory look at my sidebar will tell you that I have only read 3 books this year, and even that is a lie. I have read two books and one article out of the 3rd book. It is crap and useless, and if I do nothing else, I want to get the reading habit back.

Christopher Priest for quite a long time, along with Harlan Ellison and Stephen King, was one of my favourite writers. I read all of his books up until the mid 1980's and then other things started taking over. I have never read "The Prestige". I will have to remedy that.

"The Prestige" (movie) is really good. It's the story of the rivalry, sometimes vicious and destructive rivalry, between two stage magicians and the obsession in finding the secret of the Transported Man illusion. It's one of the best films of the year, even if I do admit that I did see one turn in the plot before it arrived. It's a gothic melodrama that becomes a gothic, steampunk fantasy and has faultless performances by Christian Bale and Hugh Jackman. Need I also say that Michael Caine is Michael Caine and Scarlett Johansson is beautiful? No. I didn't think so.

I am loathe to give anything more away, so I won't.

I read recently that after the success of "The Prestige", both "A Dream Of Wessex" and "Fugue For A Darkening Island" have been optioned for movie adaptations. I think that they are both problematic novels for adaptation ("A Dream Of Wessex" is about an experiment in creating a virtual, shared, future world from the brain power of hypnotised volunteers, and what happens when a psychopath joins the experiment; "Fugue For A Darkening Island" is about what happens when an ultra right wing government comes to power in Britain, and the effect on Britain of a million refugees, fleeing a nuclear exchange on the African continent, suddenly arriving), but if they are done right they could be brilliant. The fractured timeline of "Fugue For A Darkening Island" would suit the director of "The Prestige", Christopher Nolan, down to the ground.

I really hate Christopher Nolan. He is a genius. Bastard!

This has taken longer than I thought it would. I will be back tomorrow. "Borat". "Casino Royale". Other things.