Pynchon

"I'm not trying to pull you.
Even though I would like to.
I think you are really fit.
You're fit but my gosh, don't you know it!"

Stef wanted to know what I thought of The Streets. Hmm. I need to avoid sounding like a sad Fanboy. I must not use the words Awesome, Fantastic, Mega or Brilliant.

The Streets were very good. The gig probably wasn't as manic as the one at the NIA a year or so ago, but the band were tight (Leo the Lion is a God!), the tunes were good (even the ones from the much maligned new album) and the crowd were enthusiastic (there was a guy dressed as a pirate (?) dancing a few feet away from me). Nothing else required. (This is a really bad review. Sorry about that. Go and have a read of the mighty Swiss Toni's review from The Streets gig in Nottingham on 3rd May 2006 to see how it should be done.) More importantly I enjoyed myself without getting pissed or stoned out of my head. I also danced with a large breasted teenage girl all night. True, she didn't actually know that I was dancing with her, but I knew and that's what matters.

Great night. Really good night.

From the sublime to the ridiculous. To kill a bit of time before the gig I went to see "Three" starring Billy Zane and our very own Kelly Brook.



Oh my God! It's a catastrophe! Just terrible. Don't believe me? This is what the Independent had to say about it in Friday's entertainment supplement.

"An unholy amalgam of Lord of the Flies, The Blue Lagoon and The Admirable Crichton, in which Billy Zane and real-life fiancenKelly Brook star as a rich snob and his wife, shipwrecked on a desert island and forced to rely on a handsome Latin boatboy for survival. Soon, boatboy and Brook are exchanging smoldering glances, and we're all set for primal conflict. The big surprise is that Brook's performance is a long way from being the most embarrassing aspect of the film. At odd moments it rises to risibility, but mostly it is just dull. "

I couldn't have put it better myself, except I wouldn't say that it was a dull film. How can you fail to be entertained by the absolutely dreadful performances, the inept script and the terrible film making (check out the different film stock between shots and, in one scene, the magic scarf that disappears and reappears at will)? Still, they say that in every cloud there is a silver lining. Kelly Brooks in (and out) of her white bikini certainly impressed me.

Saturday morning Lorraine and I went to see "Eight Below".



I am always a bit suspicious of family films featuring heroic animals. Often they can be mawkish and sentimental and just too pass-the-sick-bag nice. This film was good. Of course it played with the emotions, but you really cared about the dogs and the Paul Walker character's desperation to get back to save them. Obviously Lorraine cried constantly through the second half, but I was macho and brave. I liked "Eight Below" a lot. There is a very tense and scary sequence with a monstrous leopard seal that is one of the most exciting and thrilling things I have seen in a cinema this year. Worth seeing the film just for that.

Lorraine sent me this today.

"An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole which she carried across her neck. One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water. At the end of the long walk from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full. For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do.

After two years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the woman one day by the stream. "I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house." The old woman smiled, "Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot's side?" "That's because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them.""For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table. Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house."

Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it's the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding. You've just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them. SO, to all of my crackpot friends, have a great day and remember to please smell the flowers on your side of the path!"

Life goes on. Things change and things stay the same. Maybe there isn't any sex, but I do love her.

(Bad writing tonight, I'll be better tomorrow.)